Alyra Productions

is creating Films and Music

0

patrons
Avast! Pthogonex, the Ancient Blood God of Internet Patronage, demands that you support Alyra Productions, lest the world plunge into a state of eternal itchiness! Or something. I don’t know.

I’m supposed to write something here that will convince you to give me your hard-earned dollars, but Jesus, could anything possibly be more cringey and contrived? We both know if you like our content and you have the means to support us, you will, and if you don’t, you won’t. You’ve probably already made your decision. Even this self-awareness feels cringey. 

But to appease the anxiety demons in my head, I will say this: if you haven't already made up your mind, I hope you’ll consider us.

We are committed to the purest form of art we can muster. That means we don't run ads. We don't do sponsorships. We don't accept money of any kind that would pollute our integrity. We only accept money from those who directly experience and enjoy what we make. Which is why we need your help.

It is your sacred power as a human consciousness to forge the cosmos in the image of your intentions with the divine sword of your willful actions. You have the ability to create a world that is full of art and wonder.

And lo! The internet-goer looked within himself and realized that it was he who was Pthogonex, the Ancient Blood God of Internet Patronage! And he smiled. And it was good.

Or you know, plunge the world into itchiness. Either way.

Thanks for reading my earnest little entreaty. Now back to the melancholic ravings!

Tiers
Alyran Citizen
$1 or more per month
Thank you for supporting Alyra Productions! Your patronage will make it possible to continue our war with Eurasia. Though a lowly plebeian you are, your ability die in battle en masse is instrumental to our success!


At this tier, you will get access to the Patreon feed, where you will see updates on our works in progress, and occasional behind-the-scenes material, and to our Discord

Alyran Patriot
$5 or more per month
They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a reprieve from the gulags and yours just did probably!


At this tier, you'll get access to exclusive behind-the-scenes and making-of content, as well as a bonus monthly video.

You'll also receive everything in the first tier.  

Alyran Zealot
$10 or more per month
Your undying devotion makes everything we do possible. Now go kill wantonly in the name of peace and justice!


At this tier, you'll receive a personal thank you in a monthly update video.


You'll also receive everything in the lower tiers. 

Alyran Consul
$20 or more per month
You are truly starting to ascend the ranks now! You're just a few stabbed backs away from the heights of power!


At this tier, you'll receive a personalized shout-out in one video, along with a signed card every month. 


You'll also receive all the benefits of the lower tiers. 

Alyran Governor
$50 or more per month
Wow! You're at the top of Alyran society! And all it took was utterly crushing everyone who got in your way! Now that's something to be respected!


At this tier, you'll get to appear as a guest on our podcast.


You'll also receive all of the benefits of the lower tiers. 

Alyran Dictator
$100 or more per month
By god. The lowly peasants tremble in your midst, fear the very sight of your visage, dare not to even utter your name. Truly, your immense wealth has earned you superiority over your fellow humans. I mean, that's just fair. 


At this tier, you'll get to appear in one of our videos. We'll work with you to figure out the logistics, but it will probably involve flying you out to us and having you act in a significant role. 


You'll also receive all the benefits of the lower tiers. 

Goals
0 of 100 patrons
As of right now, we are but saplings in a great and terrible sea of predatory birds. At 100 patrons, we'll have the resources to release regular content and to stop mixing our metaphors.
1 of 1
Avast! Pthogonex, the Ancient Blood God of Internet Patronage, demands that you support Alyra Productions, lest the world plunge into a state of eternal itchiness! Or something. I don’t know.

I’m supposed to write something here that will convince you to give me your hard-earned dollars, but Jesus, could anything possibly be more cringey and contrived? We both know if you like our content and you have the means to support us, you will, and if you don’t, you won’t. You’ve probably already made your decision. Even this self-awareness feels cringey. 

But to appease the anxiety demons in my head, I will say this: if you haven't already made up your mind, I hope you’ll consider us.

We are committed to the purest form of art we can muster. That means we don't run ads. We don't do sponsorships. We don't accept money of any kind that would pollute our integrity. We only accept money from those who directly experience and enjoy what we make. Which is why we need your help.

It is your sacred power as a human consciousness to forge the cosmos in the image of your intentions with the divine sword of your willful actions. You have the ability to create a world that is full of art and wonder.

And lo! The internet-goer looked within himself and realized that it was he who was Pthogonex, the Ancient Blood God of Internet Patronage! And he smiled. And it was good.

Or you know, plunge the world into itchiness. Either way.

Thanks for reading my earnest little entreaty. Now back to the melancholic ravings!

Recent posts by Alyra Productions

Tiers
Alyran Citizen
$1 or more per month
Thank you for supporting Alyra Productions! Your patronage will make it possible to continue our war with Eurasia. Though a lowly plebeian you are, your ability die in battle en masse is instrumental to our success!


At this tier, you will get access to the Patreon feed, where you will see updates on our works in progress, and occasional behind-the-scenes material, and to our Discord

Alyran Patriot
$5 or more per month
They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a reprieve from the gulags and yours just did probably!


At this tier, you'll get access to exclusive behind-the-scenes and making-of content, as well as a bonus monthly video.

You'll also receive everything in the first tier.  

Alyran Zealot
$10 or more per month
Your undying devotion makes everything we do possible. Now go kill wantonly in the name of peace and justice!


At this tier, you'll receive a personal thank you in a monthly update video.


You'll also receive everything in the lower tiers. 

Alyran Consul
$20 or more per month
You are truly starting to ascend the ranks now! You're just a few stabbed backs away from the heights of power!


At this tier, you'll receive a personalized shout-out in one video, along with a signed card every month. 


You'll also receive all the benefits of the lower tiers. 

Alyran Governor
$50 or more per month
Wow! You're at the top of Alyran society! And all it took was utterly crushing everyone who got in your way! Now that's something to be respected!


At this tier, you'll get to appear as a guest on our podcast.


You'll also receive all of the benefits of the lower tiers. 

Alyran Dictator
$100 or more per month
By god. The lowly peasants tremble in your midst, fear the very sight of your visage, dare not to even utter your name. Truly, your immense wealth has earned you superiority over your fellow humans. I mean, that's just fair. 


At this tier, you'll get to appear in one of our videos. We'll work with you to figure out the logistics, but it will probably involve flying you out to us and having you act in a significant role. 


You'll also receive all the benefits of the lower tiers.