junkmailz is creating fiction
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We need your help. Our stepfather tethered us to a cinder block beneath a bus stop awning and is withholding food and affection unless we can raise $1.2MM to pay for cosmetic surgery. It's a lot to ask, we know, but our life expectancy declines with each mouthful of bus exhaust. Not that we're complaining. 

Our stepfather isn't evil, but he is perversely dedicated to altering his facial features. These things cost money, especially advanced protocols such as sinus glitter and eyelid glazing. He swears people will want to eat him he'll look so good, and this is what we fear most.

Should we surpass our goal of $1.2MM, all surplus funds will be dumped into a vat of acid. The acid will then be used as jet fuel to travel back in time and refund your money, in which case we will have a beautiful new stepfather and your wallet will be as heavy as ever. Or heavier, depending on our mood. 

Thank you in advance for supporting our Patreon. It's like a black hole, but brighter. 
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When I reach $500 per month I'll eat a cheeseburger and sleep.
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We need your help. Our stepfather tethered us to a cinder block beneath a bus stop awning and is withholding food and affection unless we can raise $1.2MM to pay for cosmetic surgery. It's a lot to ask, we know, but our life expectancy declines with each mouthful of bus exhaust. Not that we're complaining. 

Our stepfather isn't evil, but he is perversely dedicated to altering his facial features. These things cost money, especially advanced protocols such as sinus glitter and eyelid glazing. He swears people will want to eat him he'll look so good, and this is what we fear most.

Should we surpass our goal of $1.2MM, all surplus funds will be dumped into a vat of acid. The acid will then be used as jet fuel to travel back in time and refund your money, in which case we will have a beautiful new stepfather and your wallet will be as heavy as ever. Or heavier, depending on our mood. 

Thank you in advance for supporting our Patreon. It's like a black hole, but brighter. 

Recent posts by junkmailz

Tiers
Basic Junkie
$1.27 or more per month only 50 left
Access to all periodic junk.
Bad Habit Junkie
$4.99 or more per month only 25 left
Get a free piece of junk fiction with yourself as the star.
Demonic Junkie
$66.66 or more per month only 6666 left
Ghost visitations and subliminal messages