The Dorito Master

The Dorito Master

is creating Interactive Neckbeard D&D Campaigns

1

patron

$1

per month
Hark, brave adventurer! You have stumbled upon a moist, odorous place, but fear not, for The Dorito Master shall be your guide. This land is called Neckbeardia, home of all things neckbeard, and it has equal chances of being your salvation or your greasy ruin. 

Have you ever encountered a fat slob of a man-child and thought to yourself, "Damnation, how can I be as enlightened?" Well good news, because here's your chance! Through the power of the internet, The Dorito Master has the ability to guide you through unimaginable perils and lead you to rewards that bring all the overweight girls to the yard. Just as long as they keep their distance, Sagan forbid you actually talk to one of them. 

This is accomplished through interactive campaigns, split up into multiple parts, and you, yes YOU, the one with your hand in your pants, have the power to change how it unfolds!

At the end of each part a decision will confront your avatar, and herein lies your part in the adventure. A straw poll will be posted alongside it and, after a few days, The Dorito Master will continue the story based on whichever decision won. You may meet strange and fascinating characters, you may gain their trust and see them die on the field of battle in your name, you may even pass by them without a second thought. Death is permanent and every decision you make carries weight, so choose wisely.

With your donations of Good Boy Points, or GBP for short, The Dorito Master may petition the hag known as MOTHER for all the commodities necessary to survive, such as chicken tendies and various flavors of that holy nectar known as Mountain Dew. 

So. Adventurer. Are you brave enough? Are you smart enough? Are you quick enough, strong enough, heroic enough to beat the Normies and save Neckbeardia? 

Blood, glory, and a faint stench of squid awaits.

Tiers
Neckbeard
$1 or more per month
  • A tip of the fedora to you, good sir/ma'am, you are a gentleman/gentlem'lady and a scholar!
  • Your name shall be inscribed upon the end of every campaign for future generations to gaze upon in wonderment!
M'lady
$5 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, and you shall gain access to every tale a day before it's posted anywhere else!
Virgin Wizard
$10 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, and you stumble across a strange, magical box that swallows suggestions on how to improve one's journey and teleports them to another dimension! It's slightly crusty and smells terrible!
My Little Patron
$20 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, the box, and The Dorito Master himself shall send ponies to your dwellings with secret messages detailing small occurrences from the next part of the campaign! 
White Knight
$50 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, the disgusting box, the ponies, and The Dorito Master will work with you personally to design a magnificent create-a-beard that the heroes might just encounter in a present or future campaign!
Descendant of Dawkins
$100 or more per month only 10 left
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, the vile box, the ponies, and The Dorito Master shall work with you to develop a create-a-beard with such charm that they fully integrate themselves as party members in a future campaign!
The Euphoria That Walks The Earth
$500 or more per month only 5 left
  • Hollowed be thy name! A tip of a golden fedora, your beautiful name inscribed, early access, the reprehensible box, only the best ponies, and The Dorito Master shall work night and day with you to create such a wondrous character of virility and strength that they receive their own stand alone campaign!
Hark, brave adventurer! You have stumbled upon a moist, odorous place, but fear not, for The Dorito Master shall be your guide. This land is called Neckbeardia, home of all things neckbeard, and it has equal chances of being your salvation or your greasy ruin. 

Have you ever encountered a fat slob of a man-child and thought to yourself, "Damnation, how can I be as enlightened?" Well good news, because here's your chance! Through the power of the internet, The Dorito Master has the ability to guide you through unimaginable perils and lead you to rewards that bring all the overweight girls to the yard. Just as long as they keep their distance, Sagan forbid you actually talk to one of them. 

This is accomplished through interactive campaigns, split up into multiple parts, and you, yes YOU, the one with your hand in your pants, have the power to change how it unfolds!

At the end of each part a decision will confront your avatar, and herein lies your part in the adventure. A straw poll will be posted alongside it and, after a few days, The Dorito Master will continue the story based on whichever decision won. You may meet strange and fascinating characters, you may gain their trust and see them die on the field of battle in your name, you may even pass by them without a second thought. Death is permanent and every decision you make carries weight, so choose wisely.

With your donations of Good Boy Points, or GBP for short, The Dorito Master may petition the hag known as MOTHER for all the commodities necessary to survive, such as chicken tendies and various flavors of that holy nectar known as Mountain Dew. 

So. Adventurer. Are you brave enough? Are you smart enough? Are you quick enough, strong enough, heroic enough to beat the Normies and save Neckbeardia? 

Blood, glory, and a faint stench of squid awaits.

Recent posts by The Dorito Master

Tiers
Neckbeard
$1 or more per month
  • A tip of the fedora to you, good sir/ma'am, you are a gentleman/gentlem'lady and a scholar!
  • Your name shall be inscribed upon the end of every campaign for future generations to gaze upon in wonderment!
M'lady
$5 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, and you shall gain access to every tale a day before it's posted anywhere else!
Virgin Wizard
$10 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, and you stumble across a strange, magical box that swallows suggestions on how to improve one's journey and teleports them to another dimension! It's slightly crusty and smells terrible!
My Little Patron
$20 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, the box, and The Dorito Master himself shall send ponies to your dwellings with secret messages detailing small occurrences from the next part of the campaign! 
White Knight
$50 or more per month
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, the disgusting box, the ponies, and The Dorito Master will work with you personally to design a magnificent create-a-beard that the heroes might just encounter in a present or future campaign!
Descendant of Dawkins
$100 or more per month only 10 left
  • A tip of the ol' fedora, your name inscribed, early access, the vile box, the ponies, and The Dorito Master shall work with you to develop a create-a-beard with such charm that they fully integrate themselves as party members in a future campaign!
The Euphoria That Walks The Earth
$500 or more per month only 5 left
  • Hollowed be thy name! A tip of a golden fedora, your beautiful name inscribed, early access, the reprehensible box, only the best ponies, and The Dorito Master shall work night and day with you to create such a wondrous character of virility and strength that they receive their own stand alone campaign!