Think of the Children

is creating A Dumb Podcast about Ruining your Childhood

Select a membership level

Sleeping Partner
per month
Now, legally, you don't have any partnership in the company. However, you can put this on your CV and it'll look all professional-like.
In addition to those *sweet* bragging rights, you get access to the Patreon role on our Discord. Pretty sweet deal for a buck, I must say.
Includes Discord benefits
Angel Investor
per month
This you might be able to get away with? Since you're an investor rather than a partner? Ask your lawyer.
In addition to them bragging rights like I said, you'll get that Discord Role that's so coveted, and we'll add your name to the list of Patreons when Owen finally gets off his ass and gets the website up and running. Until then, we'll shout you out at the end of each episode in the housekeeping notes.
Includes Discord benefits
Archangel Investor
per month
This one isn't a real thing, so while it doesn't hold water on a CV, it also means you probably won't get into any legal trouble, so there's that at least.
Descending from on high with your money has it's perks though. You get the Discord Role, you get immortalised for the rest of linear time on our website *and* Owen and Jay will record a very heartfelt and genuine message of thanks, personalised for you. You can say we're friends if you want, and everything.
Includes Discord benefits




per month


Hey, we're Owen and Jay, and we make an intensely NSFW comedy podcast called Think of the Children.

It's a show in which we attempt to make you laugh by destroying the thing you love most: Your Childhood. To achieve this goal, we take the things you love from childhood (Movies, TV Shows, Video Games, Food, Long forgotten memories with your cousins etc) and try to pervert them in a profane ritual. So far we've made Matilda into a crime serial, Rugrats into an edgy murder mystery, Teletubbies into a Lovecraftian Nightmare, and so much more.

This show is a great outlet creativley, and we're obsessed with bottom line, so it'd be cool to actually break even (Hence our super low goal).

If you like the show and would consider kicking a couple of bones our way to help pay for hosting each month, we'd really appriciate it. Otherwise, you can keep listening to the low, low price of free every single Wednesday!

And hey, if you don't know about our show, consider checking us out at!
$14 of $30,000 per month
Jay will now say his name at the end of the Podcast.
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