Patrick Garrity

is creating A Never Ending Comedy Tour

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never-ending tour supporter
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Thanks so much for your support! Your contribution makes my life on the road a little bit easier. The never-ending your continues. you will have access to any and all content that I create. including my videos and podcast. 

never-ending tour supporter
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You've selected the $2 dollar Tier! it comes with the same benefits and access to all the content as the $1 dollar tier. But you're showing me that you care twice as much! thanks so much for your support! the never-ending tour continues!

never-ending tour supporter
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You've selected the $5 dollar Tier! it comes with the same benefits and access to all the content as the $1 dollar tier. Thank you so much for your support. I hope you enjoy the content that I provide. Hopefully I get more fans that have your enthusiasm and will be able to get that tour bus someday!




per month


Hey everyone, 
  Welcome to my Patreon. I'm a national touring comedian. and here's the pitch.. 
this is long. you should read it while pooping

2020 will be my eleventh year of the never-ending tour. I have no home or residence. I literally live on the road. Touring nonstop around the country. I mostly sleep on couches, futons, air mattresses and in my car at rest stops. 2020 will be my 19th year as a stand up comic. My goal with my Patreon is to reach 100,000 subscribers with each person subscribing for just $1 dollar. Then each month I'll bring 3 different very talented comedians with me on my never-ending tour across the country. Then I'll pay each comic 25 grand for that month. Then the following month will be 3 new comics and so on. There will be no "star of the show". We will all split the time. And i think with people's short attention spans this will be an excellent format. There is no more "last comic standing" but there are still so many unknown masters out there waiting to be discovered. I want my tour to be my brand. I want it to be something I can share with my fellow comics and help them with their careers. A spot on one of the late night shows like Fallon, Kimmel and Conan is nice but doing 5 minutes of watered down material isn't doing shit for anyone's career. After 19 years in this business i can tell you what comedians want the most is just to work and do our comedy and be paid what we're worth. We're not all trying to be Eddie Murphy or Dave Chappelle. We just want to Pay our bills. Me personally I just eventually wanna be able to afford a home and a dog. I'm honestly tired of being homeless. I love all the people I've met on this journey. but I want something more to show for all the years of hard work that I've invested than a bad back and a bag of hotel room key cards. I just want to be able to drive without looking at a check engine light on. 25 grand is at least enough to give my fellow comics a little bit of breathing room. It will relieve a lot of stress and anxiety. Especially those out there grinding that have families. I'm alone, I have no significant other or any children and I'm still drowning. I couldn't imagine how much more stressful this would be if i had kids. They say its rude to ask "how much do you make?"Thats because sometimes it's fucking embarrassing to tell you. This week I'm making $200 dollars because i was only able to book one show. Comedians are just like everyone else. We live week to week but sometimes we don't get a paycheck every week because we don't get booked every week. I'm not telling you this because I want your sympathy. I just want your respect. Every time you go to a comedy show you're supporting someone chasing a dream. I don't care about being famous, I just don't ever want to be a waste of someone's evening. I wanna be worth the babysitter you paid for to have a night out. Our jobs as comedians is to entertain you. So how do you make a killer show? its easy, just put all killers on the show. and after 19 years in this business I know who the killers are. This could easily be a show that you could see on Netflix or comedy Central. But a network can cancel shows. However if its fueled by subscribers then it can never be cancelled. and my never-ending tour will truly be never-ending. Eventually one day i will retire from the road and I'll pass my never-ending tour down to a new captain for the next generation of comics to enjoy. Thats the great thing about the internet. you don't need a network to support an idea. you just need people. And that's what I want. the power of the people. Every single fan of mine discovered me because they took a chance on an unknown comedian. If you support my Patreon you'll be helping me support all those other amazing comics out there busting their asses trying to bring laughter to the masses. You will really get to know these comics as they will be guests on my weekly podcast for the entire month they're on tour. 100,000 really isn't that big of a number. Jersey Shore has 15 million followers and every single person on that show is a human trash bag with nothing to contribute but their volatile personalities. There is a girl with nearly 200,000 followers who just smushes bread with her face. I'm not kidding. Just look up "bread face" and you'll see what I'm talking about. Please just subscribe for a dollar and I'll put together one of the best tours in the entire country with the best and most talented comedians you otherwise never would have heard about. I'm just so tired of killing myself trying to get a "piece of the pie". With this idea, I can create a pie and give everyone a slice. The never-ending tour continues. Who's coming with me?
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